Sunday, June 29, 2008
Oh Lord,
i've never really prayed before.
and i've cursed and sweared at you,
blaming you for everything that has happened in my life.
i guess,
its of no doubt that my this little prayer would go unanswered.
so much has happened.
i look back and i find myself being a complete scum.
the people i loved,
they seem so distant now.
the reflection i see now,
it holds a monster.
i'm tired of being so negative all the time.
i dont want to be so angry, so depressed.
sorrow is an ugly demon,
which tears my soul inside out.
i've been crying at night,
alone on my bed.
he whom has become a part of me,
tells me he no longer needs me in his life one night.
devastated, i am.
but i knew i was to blame.
downhill it all went.
to a point where he detested me,
ignored and avoided my presence.
it claws upon me.
but what could i possibly do.
i've lost faith in all my other friendships.
i dont want to go through the hurt once more.
crossroads at a junction:
to let go,
or blindly hope that things would pick up.
which i know he will never come back to me.
i need directions Lord,
i need signals,
a sign.
my heart's screaming for a new life.
Amen.
;
9:14 AM
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