Sunday, August 31, 2008
synesthesia.
Anger.
he sits towering above all the others,
but he Loves them all deep Red inside.
Dynamic.
he stands, with an Orange burning flame of passion and love.
a heart that is young, brave and daring.
Happiness.
it all seems superficial, with everything that he tries to hold onto,
it all fades away with Time.
my Yellow isn't so mellow over these times,
in fact, i think its frightened.
Jealousy.
she sits on a throne,
Green with envy,
as it rears its ugly head.
she takes everything i love away from me.
Tranquility.
his eyes wandered about the clear Blue sky.
a sense of peace,
a quiet mind,
with nature to talk to.
Intuitions.
his mind was in a whirl of Indigo.
insecurities surfaced.
they took over his body, little demons.
and sold his soul.
i lost You to them.
Power.
he wears his Violet shiny metalic armour.
with overwhelming strength from within.
but yet, it wasn't enough to hold things that he love close to him.
And all these emotions of mine keep holding me from,
Giving my life to a rainbow like you.
and now,
all that is left of me.
is a black and white.
;
6:33 AM
***
Monday, August 25, 2008
the bucket list.
"I can't claim to understand the measure of a life, but I can tell you this: I know that when he died, his eyes were closed and his heart was open."
watching this heartwarming movie,
about two complete strangers who fought cancer,
came together as close friends,
tought each other lessons about life,
spent their remaining months of their lives fulfiling a list of things that they want to do before they actually 'kick the bucket'.
it makes me think and reflect about the people who impacted my life,
friends i love.
after the movie,
somehow i just want to reach out and give them a hug,
and tell them how much they mean to me.
but some, are far too away from me.
Rico.
thanks rico, for being the first person to really touch my life.
to show me what it feels like to be loved by a brother.
the never failing encouragements and words of wisdom that brought me to my feet.
thank you. (:
Daniel Joshua.
thanks for standing by me for 8 full years,
going through all the shit with me.
thanks for being one i can relate to,
and giving a nice hug at the end of every long day.
cheers, and i hope our friendship would still remain strong.
ASS. (:
Hendricks.
the one with undying love.
firstly, i apologise for the ugly past,
for putting you through so much.
and yet, you still continued to be there for me in times of need.
i really appreciate everything you've done. (:
Jordan!
the medicine to my pessimism!
for every negative thought i have,
you never fail to encourage me with a positive word of yours.
thank you for changing my life,
and allowing me to take a new attitude towards it.
i realy wanna thank you for bringing me closer to God. (:
Nick yau.
firstly,
i want to apologise for all the selfish things that i did or said to you in the past.
and those times that you put up with me and gave in to me.
i'm sorry.
it's no wonder why your treating me like that now,
with all your cold replies.
and i've been living with alot of regrets,
though you might not believe or trust me anymore.
i guess you probably hate me now,
or it might be due to the peer pressure around you.
and somehow i just miss your presence.
i'm not asking you to forgive me.
i just want to thank you for those great times,
you were by my side,
when i was down, insecure, and injured.
you never failed to make me smile with a warm hug of yours.
to love and be loved.
you still mean alot to me.
thanks boy. (:
how can i stand here with you,and not be moved by you.
;
8:13 AM
***
and absence makes the heart fonder.
Your heart is a river that flows from your chest.
Through every organ.
Your brain is the dam.
And i am the fish who can't reach the core.
;
7:41 AM
***
Friday, August 22, 2008
And peaceful villages, rolls dreadful on:
the Victor shouts triumphant; he enjoys
The roar of cannon and the clang of arms,
And urges, by no soft relentings stopped,
the work of Death and Carnage. Yet should one,
A single sufferer from the field escaped,
Panting and pale, and bleeding at his feet,
Lift his imploring eyes, the hero weeps;
He is grown human, and capricious Pity,
Which would not stir for thousands, melts for one.
With sympathy spontaneous:" Tis not Vitue,
Yet 'tis the weakness of a virtuous mind.
;
8:21 AM
***
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
PRELIMS.
ARGH.
MUST PASS MATHS!
;
8:22 AM
***
Friday, August 15, 2008
this lust to my head almost feels like a gun.
i'm not asking for much.and i'm really sorry about all the stupid things i said or did to you.i really am.all the blaming,all the selfish talk about you not allowed to shine.i was so insecure.i'm sorry.
and i know i deserved all this.it hurts to be ignored and shunned by you.i just hope to be treated the same as the rest.just a normal conversation,no wait,just a smile.and the clouds in my mind would clear.
i miss you.
and i'l keep praying.one day. just one day.that smile.or a simple conversation.or perhaps a warm hug.
God works wonders.
;
10:34 AM
***
Friday, August 8, 2008
it's been so long since you last spoke to me.
and i'm starting to wonder,
whether this prayers are going to go on,
unanswered.
i'm twisted.
cause one side fo me is telling me to move on,
but on the otherside,
i just wanna break down and cry.
;
8:02 AM
***
Wednesday, August 6, 2008
... but home is nowhere.
This is my line, this is eternal.
How did I ever end up here?
Discarnate, preternatural.
My prayers to disappear.
Absent of grace, marked as infernal.
Ungranted in dead time left me disowned.
To this nature, so unnatural.
I remain alone.
Give me something, give me something real.
I lay strewn across the floor,
can't solve this puzzle.
Everyday another small piece can't be found.
I lay strewn across the floor,
pieced up in sorrow.
The pieces are lost,
these pieces don't fit.
Pieced together incomplete and empty.
;
8:19 AM
***
Monday, August 4, 2008
fear, it engulfs me whole.
matchsticks and a spark.
light a fire back in him,
a flame of burning passion.
the man with a big heart,
shattered but renewed,
but fear that has its shadow over him.
so swallow him whole, not.
a haze that beckons him in,
is he gonna crumble to just like that.
patience.
it all takes time.
there can be no happiness without pain.
;
6:30 AM
***