Saturday, January 31, 2009
just like a beautiful sun rises,
the sun sets as well.
humanly promises, like any other,
they give a false sense of shelter and consolation to your heart,
a moment of joy to your soul.
but as time passes,
now, now, what do we see in these facade.
everyone's running about in a different world of their own.
we've all drifted apart haven't we?
oh lord, i come before you.
only you can satisfy,
my soul's deepest desires.
fill me whole, with your tender love.
;
10:33 AM
***
Friday, January 30, 2009
if you could only know me skin deep.
complexity concealed by a veil of simplicity,
i'm more than a myriad of black and white.
everyone has scars to show, chains to break.
i once was, but now i am.
do you still see a past, or a present in me.
an image potrayed in your mind's eye,
but is that what you truly see?
certainly. theres more than what meets the eye.
;
10:40 AM
***
Thursday, January 29, 2009
;
9:58 AM
***
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
on and off.
like a flame on a candle,
standing tall amidst the wind.
flickering with the howling and rustling.
misguided by the worldly tempations and directions.
the flame slowly extinguishes,
but rekindles again moments later.
somehow i feel something's pulling me back in this path with God.
it feels like a void inside me, undescribable.
i really need some quiet time,
to calm this startling mind of mine.
the problem is,
time and space is what i'm denied of.
and i'm getting frustrated.
;
9:55 AM
***
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
the mirror speaks, but the reflection lies.
to free this heavy heart of mine,
i feel for the need to kick the devil out of my life.
come Holy Spirit, fall in this place.
i need more and more of you.
;
9:54 AM
***
tell me whats it like to feel so alive.
bingbangboom.
left4dead is the new dope mann.
we need more CG outings like that,
filling the entire room with shrieks and screams (ahem),
with roars of triumph and laughter.
HAHAHA!
we.are.gonna.expand.
i'm not yet satisfied with the numbers,
are you?
reaching out to more,
theres more to come.
simple awesome. (:
but for now, incubation.
;
7:03 AM
***
Saturday, January 24, 2009
i'm living and loving my life.TODAY WAS AWESOME.
COMBINED CG CYCLING AT EAST COAST.
FOLLOWED BY REUNION LUNCH STEAMBOAT.
THANKS GUYS. (:
09' IS GONNA BE AWESOME!
;
9:21 AM
***
the domino effect.
stop. pause. think.
do you not have a conscience?
shaped and moulded by the world outside,
do you not have your own beliefs?
falling down,
one by one.
the saddest part is that your oblivious to where your heading to.
like a broken damn you're empty,
and all that's left are the sticks and stones that were built by other people.
it pains me,
it really does.
how can one be so proud about losing one's virginity.
loved ones going astray.
and i can only pray.
;
8:26 AM
***
Thursday, January 22, 2009
so where do we go now,
where do we go?
"JT, i realised you have shrunk leh, what have you been doing during the holidays?"
"nothing eh sir, just been busy in church."
"you stopped working out?"
"yea, why?"
"i think you pushed yourself too hard last time. thats why now your body is seeing the effects. your body is starting to shrink."
back to basics.
;
9:13 AM
***
Monday, January 19, 2009
sick.
i'm thrown into a disarray of a hot and then a cold,
throat's infused with phelgm,
head's throbbing with headache.
bottomline is, i dont feel good.
;
9:15 AM
***
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
i . cant . breathe.
I am not alone,
I live with the memories and regret is my home.
This is my true freedom,
Express all the feelings of what I've become.
I watch the rising sun,
I hope I find some peace today.
It seems I've gone away,
It seems I've lost myself.
It seems I've really lost my way,
It seems I've lost myself.
It seems I've Shed my skin
Are you ready for me,
Or purge my love.
Are you ready for me?
A bitter sinking feeling.
;
9:27 AM
***
could i cry, all that is withheld in me.
locked in a room,
enclosed by the four corners of the world,
with only a small glass window at the side.
a window that brought forth hope in his life,
a window that allowed glorious light to shine through.
through this glass window,
he saw familiar faces,
sunken and drunk,
from heavy smoking and excessive drinking.
it gripped his heart,
as he started hammering against the window,
screaming, pleading, begging.
but they cant hear him.
thus he slumped down,
and it dwelled upon him that,
he was in his own world,
and they were in theirs.
in the dead of the night,
oh, what a deafening silence,
and suddenly he felt,
so lost and alone.
where is everybody?
;
9:01 AM
***
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
Will they open their eyes,
And realize we are one.
he feels the pain,
so deep, twisted in his guts.
a lost in his life.
but he cant do much,
he is clawing at himself,
for being so useless,
for allowing you to do these.
the change that you have become.
it pains me to see you wasting your life away.
Through the eyes of one he knows,
he saw a vision,
a vision kept alive,
but now its blurred.
as his weary hands typed his innermost cries on the screen,
tears streamed down his face.
would you believe me if i said i still felt for you all these while.
and now i'm broken and down on my knees,
oh Heavenly Father, i pray for for these lost sheeps to be found.
;
10:01 AM
***
Monday, January 12, 2009
by faith.
God is an amazing God.
everything i prayed for, he provides.
yepp, 15 points for L1R5!
SAJC FTW!
and no, i'm not going there for rugby,
cause rugby no longer revolves around my world. (:
yepp, and my family are so satisfied with me that they gave me lots of money as a reward.
hoho, no more tied down by money matters man.
i'm thinking of giving 50 bucks back to God.
we must reciprocate!
AND I CAN FINALLY BUY MY LONG AWAITED VANS!
WOOHOO!
hahaha, must persuade nicholas yap to come to sajc,
basket, score so well.
we confirm same class, same combi.
HAHAHA! MY NEW BEST FRIEND. (:
AMEN!
;
9:17 PM
***
Sunday, January 11, 2009
living rain, fall again,come and flood my life.
refreshed in the spirit,
i'm ready to take on 09 man.
the world outside, can say what they want,
think what they want,
but i shall not be uprooted! (:
livinf with personal convictions!
i'm ahead of my bible reading plan man!
gonna finish Old Testament by this year.
HAHAHA!
today's sermon was powerful.
the roadmap of a Christians' walk.
amazing stuff.
and so was lights training!
i'm gonna do lights for service soon man!
cant wait. (:
'o' levels results tmr,
by faith, FTW!
HAHAHAH! (:
;
8:21 AM
***
Friday, January 9, 2009
if only time flew like a dove,
faster then how i'm falling fast now.
my mind is completely screwed man.
feeling damn stressed out.
'o' levels results.
what ifs, what ifs, what ifs.
ah, i didnt get to play much in today's match.
maybe its God's way of protecting me from injuries.
but i felt like shit on the inside.
theres something in me thats telling me i musnt lose my starting postion.
gosh, the past emotions are surfacing once more,
i MUST get rid the inferiority complex in me.
and we're pretending as though we cant see one another.
shifty eyes, and ignorance.
my heart's hardened with guilt,
how much i want to just start anew.
how much i want to shout it out,
that i'm no longer who i used to be.
but you wouldnt let me speak,
you wouldnt listen.
you dont seem to want to have anything to do with me.
you left me with a heart chained with a weight,
hardened, and left hanging dry.
as i await the day,
your smile or a word of 'hi',
shall set me free.
oh, i pray for the death of the term called strangers.
gahh, i cant seem to dwell in the Lord's presence at home for the past few days.
it feels like something hindering me, pulling me away.
i need to be recharged in the spirit.
SATURDAY IN CHURCH, HERE I COME!
;
9:37 AM
***
Thursday, January 8, 2009
you can run, but how long can you hide.
fervant prayers., fervant prayers, fervant prayers.
no more mediocre christians,
but on fire christians.
had a tiring week man.
rugby tranings were hardcore, but fun.
hahaha, jeg, lumpy and the gang are just awesome.
playing SRC tmr.
crazy man.
smallest backline in sajc.
dont go hospital can already lah.
HAHA!
tireddd.
'o' levels results released on monday.
15 points! (:
;
6:43 AM
***
Monday, January 5, 2009
So I look in your direction,
But you pay me no attention, do you.
I know you don't listen to me.
'cause you say you see straight through me, don't you.
;
7:03 AM
***
Saturday, January 3, 2009
with greater capacity.
09 has began.
kinda excited, but afraid as well.
jc's life is starting.
fun, but stressful.
meaning i have to juggle studies, rugby and church stuff.
WHOA.
but God has promised greater capacity in me.
lets start finding life in the mundane!
had a bus tour around singapore praying for all the schools yesterday.
kinda cool, really.
it touches my heart to see how much HOGC really emphasizes on salvation.
BABE OF THE YEAR.
HAHA!
;
8:08 PM
***
Friday, January 2, 2009
the end where i begin.Sometimes tears say all there is to say,
Sometime your first scars wont ever fade, away.
Tried to break my heart,
Well it's broke.
Tried to hang me high,
Well I'm choked.
Wanted rain on me,
Well I'm soaked,
Soaked to the skin.
It's the end where I begin.
Now I'm alive and my ghosts are gone,
I've shed all the pain,
I've been holding on.
The cure for a heart,
Is to move along, is to move along,
So move along.
What don't kill a heart,
Only makes it strong.
;
10:21 AM
***
